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A Man In Your Prime

So, to follow up my previous post –  The Ultimate Team
I thought it’d be good to elaborate on why these guys are my close friends.

It goes beyond growing up together, developing our relationships. The main reason I rate the guys mentioned in my post as members in my team boils down to the fact that we are all aligned with our focus to becoming a fully developed man once our prime comes.

We’re all in our early 20’s, and ideally most men peak between their mid to late 30’s (35 – 40), so we’ve got about 2 decades to reach this goal – God willing.


Kai Greene. Check out the movie Generation Iron

Kai Greene. Check out the movie Generation Iron

From the previous post, its pretty evident that we do not share the same personality. On the other hand we all share the same end goal but our standard on values and what makes us feel good are all different.

I classed these guys as main because they want to get good at every aspect of their lives. We do, I know i do, have other friends outside these guys that are also doing well in life but they have not bought into the idea of self development. They have elements that I would like to take on, but they do not represent the ultimate version I would like to become e.g. some are laying numerous amount of girls but flunking exams, some own there own business but are unfit, some have completely accepted themselves but are constantly doing drugs.


With this mind, I look at what I have achieved since I was 16 and look towards what I want to achieve when I am 35 – Becoming a man in my prime. They do not tie into it. I have done good so far. I mean, I know I have, with my my guys, have long left the BETA male sect.

How do I know this ?
In my opinion, if you want to gauge whether you’re a man in your prime (or working towards it) is pretty much, if you have a girl you’ve dated and you dumped her does she stalk you and/or threaten to kill herself.

I'd prob be the cat in this pic. meh.

I’d prob be the cat in this pic. meh.

Think about, any guy you know that’s in the gym, highly intelligent, knows how to act as man, has decent game, well dressed and a decent lifestyle. Just fucking on it. whatever girl he’s dating, the amount of energy she gets of him is insane.
– Fair enough, not every girl will try to commit suicide because of you, but they’re are a few of those girls around.

Reason why this happens is because when you have that much going on, you become such a rare breed that the gap between yourself and the other guys becomes so vast. If you cut her out of your life, there’s not going to be a lot of opportunities for her to replace you, its going to be very very difficult for her to do so.
It might not be your desire to press leverage on the girl, its just a sign that you have spent so much time developing yourself and your value that if you decided to pull that rug from underneath her the value of her life will decrease so rapidly. The quality of her life, her direction, good emotions, etc –  will all go *poof* and she’ll end up crazy.

B, if you continue, this shall be you in the near future

B in the near future

Funny now. Not so funny then.

Funny now. Not so funny then.

This provides insight into why girls will let their guys date /see multiple girls.
She hates that its happening but at the same time, she tried seeing other guys but he can’t match the amount of value being brought to the table previously.

She might hate that others fancy you but...hey

She might hate that others fancy you but…hey

Its not a money thing, but rather the way I am going to relate to that girl. They way that I am going to have her emotionally.The feeling of safety she is going to feel with me and what I’m going to do to her sexually and physically will  just be lethally enrapturing.

Pull a Kevin Hart then violate her

Pull a Kevin Hart then violate her

Not a lot of guys talk about stuff like this, being honest getting my guys into this mindset also was difficult. But we sat down and just talked, we’re 22 now. If we were to spend a further decade focussing on self development, buy the time we’re 32 we’d be peaking at every level, the amount of value we’d be bringing would be immense.

Our most valued attribute – Our ambition
Our most valued attribute in other people – Good Intentions

Roll out like superheroes

Roll out like superheroes


Part 2 of the 3 part post.







The Ultimate Team

What’s good people, how are things with you ?

I’m  dandy – just to let you know.

Don’t worry, my absence – regarding regular posts – shall soon be reduced.

I’m almost done with my degree, got about 3 weeks left to end this 3 year pursuit of a diploma – Good times.
I can’t wait to pick up on my other hobbies that have been neglected due to the hectic final year schedule I have encountered.


Deuces Uni

Deuces Uni

Any ways, with the end of another academic year fast approaching, it signals the beginning of every ones favourite time of the year – I’m indifferent to this usually but seeing as it’ll be my first summer before going into full time work/new venture of any sorts, this one is quite special.

I shall be going on holiday with a few mates. Everything’s sorted, the villa, the lads, the girls. All that’s left are the house party cups and the absurd outfits I will be wearing.

La villa

La villa

As I mentioned, I’ll be going with my mates – Scratch that, “brothers from another mother”.
With that, its bound to be epic, even though we will be accompanied by our girlfriends.

I have practically grown up with these guys, college and work wise. We all have different personalities but the cohesion between the unit is unique. Plus, the scenarios we tend to get ourselves into…..Man, madness.

Bro's mayne

Bro’s mayne


I’ll give you a run down of what they’re like using characters from popular TV shows. If you don’t know the characters, well you have some research to do then.


Sam -The Dean Winchester of the group

Sam when he's drunk

Sam when he’s drunk hah

The typical man’s man. Blunt honesty, slightly cocky, toned physique, macho personality. Basically everything you’d expect from an old school male. Typically a very simple dude with a lot of muscle – The gym motivator of the crew. You know what you get with him; no games, no play, just straight, honest answers which is what he’s loved for.
You need that person around you that’s smack you in the face if you’re messing up. I know for a fact he wouldn’t hesitate to hit me across the head (he has) if I did something stupid (Which I usually do).
On the flip side, he’ll be the same person to do fully support, if not exceed any testosterone driven mission. Drinking his way into stupor just for the hell of it in right up his alley. The team’s real friend.


Chimi – Harvey Spector



You know that friend that is always money concious, like strictly financially driven, yeah, that’s Chimi for you.
If it generally doesn’t revolve around cash inflow you’d hardly see him involved. He bares the same “winning” mentality as Harvey, as well as his dress sense. Suits, ties, smart casual boat shoes, clean low cut hair, all these fall into his outward appearance.
An individual with a large appetite for the finer things in life and an even larger appetite for wealth. He’s pure motivation, he’s the guy that you’d go for if you needed a lecturing on improvement and dedication. Alongside this, his work ethic boarders on madness, I’m talking over 60 hours a week whilst in full time education.
He also possess a strong possessive/authoritative personality which makes him the perfect partner to run game with, as he’s more direct and I’m naturally inclined to run an indirect type of approach. The perfect hype guy all we do is talk each other into doing the most illicit things imaginable just because, which actually end up happening. Everything is a good idea and is achievable, well almost anything (as long as he has bought into it)with that, it becomes a good idea and is achievable. The team’s dreamer.



My self – Hank Moody

Just about right

Just about right

I’m the writer of the pack. The philosophical guy. Soft spoken – But not so soft, introverted personality with a logical outlook on things. I’m pretty much the laid back guy of the pack.
Not always around the whole club scene and venues for parties as much but if it is has any sort of worth, I would have been invited. Unlike the other 2, I  show little reaction in situations and like Hank, this tends to appear “interesting” to girls so I have been told – I know…weird. Also, like Hank I have a “Karen” also.

I think before doing things most times, even though I go down the path that carries with it a lot of drama – My choices are driven by love. Not too much attention devoted to making money compared to Chimi, or getting overly muscular and macho like Sam, but I do fall into the middle.



That’s a run down of the guys I’ll be spending 2 weeks with.
From previous experiences, I’ll most likely be the one pouring the alcohol into the shot glass in the morning  alongside Sam -who shall be topless; whilst Chimi concentrates on lacing up his boat shoes and making sure he looks immaculate before we head out to wreck havoc on the unsuspecting victims of Seville.








And we…..hung on the corridors of D-block.
Lunchtime at college, say about 12 o’clock.

Grab Kitten and the rest lets all go get some dixy.
Jermaine and Eman were always picking off us like they’re gypsies.

Barking College self proclaimed best set.
Thanks Rushpal, Ben and Liz Westhead.
Shit wasn’t always cool, but somehow you knew some sort of education would put us in a better bet.

We’re still on our break, wheres Grant headed.
It was early days but he still had the best med.
Grades – always as high. Just like that time in our econs class.
How is it down there ? eyes low already? –  fitting into the mass with the help of Mary.

Home girl sat with Nay at the back of the room.
Couple years later and we hardly talk, seems so soon.

Wait –

My phone just flashed.
A text that read “leave your class, I need to see you”.
Lied to the tutor  “Its an emergency, a possible number 2”.
They thought I had a problem with the amount of times I had to use the loo.

Haha Fuck it, I made the best of it.
Hot-spots around the school, I’m not referring to WiFi.
And getting caught by the teachers became regular, so “she had something in her eye” became my alibi.

Couldn’t stop me though, I was always looking.
Surfing through the halls with that shark-fin mohican.
And that black jacket people thought I’d lost. Nahh, actually I wonder if it was tossed.

Classes eventually ended but we still rolled.
Early weight sessions, the genesis that caused our bodies remold.
But the bus to Romford ran slow, so the stop became a spot.
Now its spotted flashbacks when I drive past those stops.

Arms day done but I still strained to yours.
Straight to work the next day, but I could handle today’s detour.

I didn’t want to lose those jobs just in case that April ever came again
The scare of my life, a somewhat enjoyable pain.

Anyways, life’s long and this is one hell of  a phase.
Candles still burning so you lot, please make it home safe.


Pull the trigger then bite the mango. Part 1.

Table spoon.

That rush

That rush

Crush the meds down. Now, brush the powder-like substance into the spoon.
Rip the plastic off the plastic vessel. Reveal the syringe then gently twist the needle on – Careful, the tip is sharp but not that sturdy. I can’t even begin to explain how hard it is to pierce yourself with a broken point.

– Getting close now.

Lift the spoon then spark the lighter underneath it. – It melts. I guess the gods intended for this experience to occur. They gave us options…..swallow  or shoot it up; The choice is mine. Autonomy is truly a beautiful thing.

Ahh, anyways, lets rid the spoon of its liquefied burden.

Its in the syringe now. Gently tapping the side to make sure there are no air or bubbles inside it  – I feel like a doctor doing this. *tap tap tap*

Pick an arm, then strap up. – I prefer the left, the heart is towards that side.

Quickly enough a vein pops up.

We need to hurry, #WinterIsComing

Picture Pun.

We ride for the Starks !

Stab yourself with the needle – Using penetration there sounded a bit too naughty for my taste.
Then empty the foreign content into your body .

-The effects soon commence.

I feel happy.
This foreign entity makes me happy.
Lets do this more often.

I like this…

I like this addiction….. – It slowly becomes the nucleus of my life.

But, the fall from the high is a steep one



The promise of that initial stimulation keeps you around.

But it never comes.

The addiction, the thing you let inside you, you thought was sacred, you reasoned could not be replicated turns out to be a physical embodiment of  the word “public”.
People get the same treatment as you. – It’s annoying, I am not exclusive to it.
You get jealous. Conjugal visits are few and far between, and when they do happen the hits only satisfy minuscule portions of your urges – I need more but I shouldn’t push too much so I don’t end up scaring it off.

In return, this only heightens the effects of paranoia. – Where is my high going ?, with whom?, Doing what?, how long?, how frequently?.

Continuous promises and rationalizations that “this is all a phase, it will soon end” mixed with religious- type levels of belief that only this thing can provide that once god like euphoria you felt still lingers in your thoughts….but alas – *casually drops some Shakespeare in there*. There is an end, the linear thoughts eventually crawl to a halt.

There are 2 choices now.

Choices to be made..sigh


Stay. Where nothing changes, but hope that it will still lingers within your consciousness. – I mean, I prayed to God…so…


Pull the trigger on what and who you knew. Leaving with the sour memory of your failed attempt and possibly “inadequacy” as a temporary tattoo on your persona – But it’s not all doom and gloom, I still get to have the mango…